Bonding with your new baby is essential for their well-being and development while supporting their mental and physical growth. Dr. Meng Li, a pediatrician at Atrium Health Levine Children’s Myers Park Pediatrics, explains the importance of bonding and shares tips for connecting with your newborn.
What does it mean to bond with your newborn?
“Bonding is the process of establishing an emotional connection between a parent and their baby,” says Dr. Li. “This bond is characterized by feelings of love, comfort, safety and trust, and it is fundamental to a baby’s development.”
Bonding is also important for parents and caregivers.
“It’s a mutual emotional exchange that benefits both parents and babies,” says Li.
The importance of bonding with your newborn
Bonding with your infant is essential for several reasons:
- It helps your baby establish emotional security. “This emotional foundation is crucial for healthy development and can influence your child’s future relationships and emotional health,” says Li.
- Bonding supports healthy attachments. “Bonding helps your baby form secure attachments,” she says. “Babies who feel securely attached are more likely to explore their environments confidently, knowing they can rely on their parents for support.”
- It’s good for babies’ physical health. Emotional bonding has been shown to support positive sleep patterns, better immune system function and lower stress levels in infants.
How to bond with your new baby
“Babies are born to bond,” says Li. “They use body language to show when they want to connect with you, such as eye contact, mimicking facial expressions, physical touch, laughing and smiling.”
Here are a few ways to support healthy bonding between you and your child:
- Hold your baby closely. Skin-to-skin contact creates a special closeness for both babies and parents. This type of contact helps parents release hormones like endorphins, oxytocin and prolactin, which help with emotional bonding and create feelings of love and protectiveness. In addition to skin-to-skin contact, you can wear your baby in a front carrier to maintain closeness while you do your daily activities, cuddle with them or rock them.
- Make the most of feeding times. “Whether breastfeeding or bottle-feeding, this time is a special opportunity for closeness and bonding,” says Li. “Use this time to make eye contact, talk softly and enjoy the intimacy of the moment.”
- Respond to crying. Responding to your baby’s distress builds trust and security. Even if you don’t know why your baby is crying, the act of responding shows them you are there to support and care for them.
- Read, sing and talk to your baby. “Babies love to hear their parents’ voices,” she says. “Talk to your baby as often as you can in a soothing voice. You can talk about what you are doing, sing to them, try to experience the environment from your baby’s perspective and describe it to them, or read your baby a book.” Be sure to make eye contact with your baby when you sing, talk or read to them, as this can help with language development skills later in life.
- Bond during bathtime. “Bathtime can be a soothing experience for both you and your baby,” says Li. “It’s a chance for gentle touch and interaction that helps deepen your bond.”
In addition to connecting with their primary caregivers, babies can also bond with other people who regularly show them love, care and security, such as other relatives and caregivers.
What to do if you have trouble bonding with your baby
First, Li reassures parents that bonding with their baby doesn’t always happen instantly.
“Some parents may experience difficulties with bonding due to a variety of reasons, such as a long or difficult birth, postpartum depression or anxiety, sleep deprivation and fatigue, or previous emotional or psychological traumas,” she says.
If you find bonding with your baby is particularly challenging or if you’re experiencing persistent feelings of sadness, anxiety or overwhelming stress, it’s important to talk to your healthcare provider and your baby’s pediatrician.
“They can provide support, offer resources and help determine if additional assistance from a mental health professional is needed,” she says.
Finally, know that bonding with your child is a journey, not a destination.
“Bonding will evolve as you and your baby grow together,” says Li. “By understanding the importance of bonding and actively engaging in practices that promote it, you’re laying the foundation for a strong, loving relationship that will benefit your child throughout their life.”
If you have questions about bonding with your child, schedule an appointment with an Atrium Health Levine Children’s pediatrician near you.
